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More Jill Jokes

jhallen
Adventurer C
In honor of Belly Laugh Day, I submit the following:
  • Two guys walk into a bar.  You would have thought the second guy would have seen the bar.  (One of my favs)
  • This string walks into an ice cream shop and the clerk looks at him suspiciously. He says "Sorry, kid,  we don't serve your kind here." So the string walks out. He's walking down the street feeling really sad because it's a hot day and he was looking forward to his ice cream when the string sees a really large man coming down the road.  He asks the man, 'Would you tie me into a knot?'  The man looks at him and says 'Sure'. So he twists and turns the string into a big dusty, sweaty knot. Then the string walks back into the ice cream shop. The clerk looks at him a little suspiciously again and says,  "Hey, you're not that string that was just in here, are you?" The string replies "No, I'm a frayed knot."  
  • Why didn't the mother potato want her daughter to marry Tom Brokaw? Because he was a commontater.
   
7 Comments
Leah4
Frequent Flyer B
I have a joke, but it's dorky! Why do SWA employees not want cheese on their sandwiches at restaurants? It's because they only have American cheese & not Southwest! Oh, here's another one. What car do SWA pilots like to drive? They like Hondas, because they have Honda Pilots! Oh, those were bad! Ha, ha. 🙂
kfrancis1
Adventurer C
I love JILL JOKES. I wish my brain had the power to retain all that humor. I'm sending a "special" shout out to Jill today. Why did the man freeze his money? .............He wanted cold, hard, cash! What goes oh oh oh?................................Santa walking backwards. What do you call a fish with no eyes? ..............A fsh Two peanuts walk into a bar. ............... One was a salted.
Michael1
Explorer C
Two snakes were slithering in the grass and one said to the other - Do you think were poisonous? The snake replied - I sure hope not, I just bit my lip.
Kris3
Explorer C
My dad's all time favorite joke: What is the definition of a farmer? It's a man outstanding in his field!
Leah3
Adventurer B
What about this one, & I'm just picking a hotel name out of the air: Why do SWA employees not like staying at the Hampton Inn? It's because they serve Continental breakfast, not Southwest! 🙂
Leah4
Frequent Flyer B
I have another one. What restaurants do SWA employees not eat at? Answer: The Delta Cafe! P.S. It really is a good restaurant! Yum! 🙂
Leah4
Frequent Flyer B
I thought of two more. The first one is: Why do SWA employees not order cheese on their sandwiches/burgers at restaurants? It's because the only offer American cheese, & not Southwest! The second one: What two movies do they not like to watch? All Quiet on the Western Front & North by Northwest! Ha, ha. 🙂