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I will be traveling alone with my 3 month old for the first time in the next few weeks. We have decided to get her a seat and use her car seat during flight. My question id what the policy is on holding babies with their own seat during flights? If she technically has her own seat, does she have to be in it if the seat belt sign is on? She gets fussy in her seat sometimes so I'm concerned about her screaming the entire time if she can't be held/fed during nap time.
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No, just because the child under 2 years of age has a paid seat, they do not have to use it. The standard recommendation applies, "Southwest Airlines and the Federal Aviation Administration (FAA) strongly recommend that infants and small children who weigh 40 pounds or less be secured in an appropriate CRS when traveling by air."
Your idea feeding during takeoff and landing is a good one, definitely helps relieve the ear pressure and reduces crying.
--TheMiddleSeat