02-16-2010
12:58 AM
As a fat person maybe I'm starting to understand this policy. A lot of proponents of the "throw fatty from the plane" rules claim that it's a "safety" issue as well as a comfort level. They live their thin, fariey tale lives with the single burning fear that if lord forbid one of "those" people might happened to slip past the airline's gestspo somehow throwing the planets out of alignment in such a way that would cause that particular plane to crash. And then if they were fortunate enough to survive the impending carnage they would then surely die anyway becasue some portly gent with a gandular condition may have become wedged between their arm rests somehow blocking the only exit. OH DEAR GOD!! BAN ALL FAT PEOPLE FROM PLANES! a comforting policy that presupposes that your plane will crash!
Ok, switch it up. Change fat to old...or pregnant...or disabled...or affraid of flying and may not be able to move in an emergency situation because of debilitating fear. OH GOD BAN OLD PEOPLE, PREGNANT PEOPLE, DISABLED PEOPLE AND THE NERVOUS.
I'm starting to like this banning people thing. The only thing I regret is that I'm too fat to join all of the perfect people on your Magical Fantacy Plane. Maybe they'll let me on a cruise ship if I don't make any sudden movements that may capsize the thing. I'm off to practice walking softly.
Oh and something you may not have thought of...I consider myself a fantastic flotation device. Your loss.
... View more