Skip to main content

Southwest Airlines Community

O' Miss, may I ask you a question?

Not applicable
We are asked a lot of questions during flight.  The most-asked question is, "Can I use the rest room?"  The next is, "Where are we?"  The craziest question I've ever been asked is, "Did you used to be a boy?"  (My ID picture was taken when I had real short hair.)   I gave the lady my most serious look and said, "Yes, and this gentleman here was my sister!"  I'd like to share some thought-provoking questions (and some of my humorous responses) that I've been asked this past year. Q  Do the Flight Attendants and the Pilots stay together on layovers? A  Do I ask you about YOUR personal life?  The real answer is we stay at the same hotel which is what I think the red-faced woman meant. Q  My wife and I have been watching you.  You're a Gemini, aren't you? A  No, I used to be a "Jim and I," but Jim and I have been divorced for years. Q  Do I have to sit in the middle seat?  (Last available seat)  A  When you're the last one to the dinner table for Sunday dinner, you don't get the best piece of chicken. Q  Just WHO are we waiting for?  (While holding for connecting passengers) A  We are waiting for Bob and Betty Green.  They have been married twenty years; they have six children at home; they're paying the babysitter $10.00 an hour and they HAVE to get home tonight!  Q  Why does your husband let you do this?  (Asked awhile back) A  We worked together five years and spent twenty four hours a day, seven days a week side by side.  He found me looking for hit men in the classified ads--any more questions? Q  Are you always this happy? A  Yes, my children grew up! Q  Are you taking orders? A  No, I'm taking requests!  Q  Why can't I change my companion any time I want for your Companion Pass program? A  Southwest is trying to encourage monogamy! Q  What did you do to make those passengers so happy? A  I LIKED them!  No one wants to be strapped down and encapsolated in a tube at 35,000 feet with somebody who's mad at them.   I hope to see you on one of my flights some day.  If  I don't have an answer to your question, I'll make one up!     
33 Comments
Not applicable
Carole, Do you have to administer a test to determine if someone can use the bathroom? I am wondering why so many folks doubt their ability in this area. Call me curious, Blog Boy
Not applicable
Carol! It has been so long that I had forgotten how much we have missed reading your hilarious blogs! Please post again soon! 🙂 (But shhh, don't tell my professors that I'm reading the blog during class and laughing at YOUR jokes, not theirs!) Safe and fun flying! cheers, Artie
Not applicable
This reminds me: I can't count the number of times that someone will ask me where to find something while I'm shopping in retail stores. It seems that people are so starved for help, that they will decide that you're an employee and ask you questions if they think you're knowledgable. Thanks for sharing the stories, Carole.
Not applicable
Ha! I'm going to have to use a couple of those on my next flight.
Not applicable
Oh, miss? Will there be turbulence on this flight? Can you tell me when? (No fair asking Captain Ray!)
Not applicable
Welcome back to the Blog, Carole! *Throws party.* I've missed your posts! They're always great. This one is funny! :) SWA LUV!
Not applicable
Oh, Miss! Can you please tell me what city we'll be landing in? :) Silly rabbit, Trix are for kids! SWA LUV! 🙂
Not applicable
Oh miss, the cockpit, what is it? It's a little room up front that the pilots sit in but that's not important right now. Press one for yes, two for no, three for maybe, four for Paco, and five for ding! boy Joe!
Not applicable
I am a faithful Southwest flyer and flight attendents often tell me I look like your president Coleen. Do I get anything special for this? Roberta
Not applicable
Carole, You truly are classic! And aren't people funny?!! I recently had someone ask me the funniest question of my career. We were flying from Indianapolis to Phoenix. We left Indy about 7:30 am. We had been in the air for about an hour and a half when a nicely dressed young man asked me what time it was. I asked him if he wanted Phoenix time or Indy time. He said Phoenix time. I told him it was 7 o'clock in Phoenix. He looked me straight in the eye and asked if that was am or pm. I then looked HIM straight in the eye and told him " Since we haven't crossed the International Date Line, it is 7am in Phoenix". He thanked me and went back to his book.
Not applicable
Roberta, you sound just like what Colleen needs - a double. She works so hard I'm sure there are events where she needs to make an appearance and YOU could go in her place! That is indeed a compliment - I will look for you. Linda, a pleasure hearing from you. I LOVE your story. Brian, I too was taught to say "May I"; however, on the aircraft most folks say, "Can I". If the seat belt sign is lit I tell them I cannot give them permission because if they are hurt and we go to Court they will point at me and say, "SHE told me I could go!" They turn on you! It's nice to be back. My free time was devoted to a family matter - all is well now. Luv to all, Carole
Not applicable
Hi Carole- Your answers are awesome. I work in Reservations for Southwest. We get all kinds of crazy questions to. My favorite though is when a person calls to change a flight. We ask the passenger if they have their confirmation number. Almost 98% of the time they come back and say "No but I have my name." I always want to reply (but I have never to this point) "I am so glad you have your name." Thanks Carole for all your hard work as a Flight Attendant.
Not applicable
Carole- Thanks for the humor. Brian should have a contest and let all Southwest personnel submit the funniest question a passenger has asked and let us vote on the best. He could do that in his spare time. As a passenger myself, I have been asked some good ones. One of the best was after going through security at MCO and heading to the tram, someone ask me how much it cost to ride it. I can't print my answer here.
Not applicable
I have a serious question, Carole. Can you please tell me when SWA will be hiring again for FAs? 🙂 I still will send in my resumÃ
Not applicable
I swear that this is true! I was non-reving. A very nice young lady (about 23 years of age) noticed my SWA ID and asked what my job was in the company. When I told her that I was an instructor at the Flight Training Center, she asked (with a perfectly straight face) if I was a Pilot or an Autopilot! I was at a loss for words .... Carol?
Not applicable
Leah, I like your ditty! I would suggest you go ahead and re-apply. That way your application is in line when the time is right. Has it been a full year already? Ray, what about, "I'm a pilot. "Otto" pilot is a German guy! He's single - would you like to meet him?" Bless her heart. I guess I'll see you in November! Carole
Not applicable
Funny stuff! Thanks for sharing.
Not applicable
Carole and Ray, Whenever a guy tells the outside world that he works for an airline, they usually get a response back like, "Oh, are you a Pilot?" I had a friend from my days on the ramp at Delta who would respond. "Yeah, I'm a pilot. I pile it here and I pile it there." Blog Boy
Not applicable
Ah, thanks Carole! 🙂 It's actually been a little over a year since my one-on-one. It was August 23, 2006. I actually can't decide if I want to reapply next February (by then, I'll have been at my current job a year), or if I want to wait a little longer. "They start off clean & they come back dirty!" "But we're always here, so you needn't worry!" "'Cause when they come in all full of junk, we get right on 'em & we spruce 'em up!" "We clean 'em real good & we're not too pokey, so don't get in the way of the Super Hokey!" SWA is So Wonderfully Awesome! 🙂
Not applicable
Oh, Carole, I didn't make that ditty up. It's in the video, "Just Plane Shuffle." I have it at home & have watched it so much I have it memorized! :) I received an email response from Eric Hoevers today. He used to be an Inflight Recruiter. We've talked & I emailed him a few weeks ago, telling him when I plan to reapply. He said in this email they won't be hiring again until next year, but couldn't give an exact date. It depends on what SWA is doing operationally & how many are waiting in the pools. Last year, when I was going for one of my FA interviews, I was wearing one of my many SWA shirts. When I was going through security at my airport, one of the security people asked me if I had my flight ID with me! Of course, I had to say no. I wish I did! We can dress up on Halloween at work, so I'm dressing up as an FA/a CSA! I'll wear a pair of khakis, my newest SWA polo, Nike shoes, & wings! I can't wait! 🙂
Not applicable
Just came across your blog - absolutely hilarious, however I shanÂ
Not applicable
This isn't flight related, but I remember a dorky question I asked a few years ago. When I was volunteering at one of my local hospitals, I saw a new mom leaving with her babies. I asked, "Are they twins?" Of course, as soon as I said it, I knew they were & felt like a dork head! It was funny! Ha, ha, ha. :) "We draw up the plans, do the legal type stuff so you'll have a place to work & if that's not enough!" "We can refit the gate, add a color TV. We can modify the counters now, don't you see?" "When Herb says we're going to another new city, then we don't worry it'll all be ready!" Well, I better go to bed now! Zzzzzzz. SWA LUV! 🙂
Not applicable
OK, so mine is not as creative as the one's Leah has been putting up, but here's a little something I did at my interview for SWA. (I ultimately got an invite for the September 2007 class of FAs, but had to turn down at the last minute due to a family situation. I'm now in med school): (Sung to the tune of that one song, the name I don't remember, but you can probably figure it out): "We love our passengers, oh yes we do! We love all of you, it's true!! When you don't fly with us, we're blue!!!! At Southwest we love you!..... Welcome Aboard!" OK, back to studying for me now :( cheers, Artie
Not applicable
Artie, I am embarrassed to admit this but I know the name of the song. It is "We Love You, Conrad," from Bye, Bye, Bertie. What corner that bit of useless information came from in my strange mind, I really don't know. Brian
Not applicable
Aw, Artie! That's too bad you had to turn down the FA class of 2007, but I hope you try again! I've thought about signing (as in Sign Language) the next time I interview, whenever that is. I've thought about introducing myself in Sign Language & voicing what I say. I should try that when I interview again! "Paging Dr. Artie to surgery! Dr. Artie to surgery please!" (I know that's your first name). 🙂 Peace out, brotha's & sista's! 🙂
Not applicable
I hope my post from the 29th (at 9:16 pm) doesn't scare anyone in the pool or wanting to submit their resumÃ
Not applicable
Where are the humorous responses that were promised?
Not applicable
O' Miss, May I ask you a question? For years passengers were allowed to use GPS on SWA. I would pass the time with my Airmap 2000. In June the policy was changed and GPS is now listed on the never allowed column in Spirit magazine. The Flight AttendantÃ
Not applicable
David, I responded with the answer offline. I've already answered the question for you several times here. Brian
Not applicable
Carole, It is great to see you back! Although I don't have any airline-related replies that I can think of right now, or that are as funny as Leah's, I can offer a more generic one for you that is "grammatically correct" as in Brian's "may I/can I" perspective: "O' Miss, may I ask you a question?" "Sure, what's the second one?" See, I grew up reading Mad magazine's "Snappy Answers to Stupid Questions"! Kim External Blog Boy who rarely asks questions 🙂
Not applicable
Saw you at BlogWorld. Great idea, very "Southwest". Hilarious post, too!
Not applicable
I remember a dumb question I asked once! A little over 13 years ago, I had surgery. When I was in for my preop visit at the hospital, a nurse was talking with me some about general anesthetic, which I had. She told me I was not allowed to wear anything scented, & even though I promise I heard her, I asked if I could wear perfume! *Slaps forehead.* I felt like an idiot asking when I knew I couldn't! Ha, ha, ha, ha. "Gee, Dad!" P.S. I made reservations to fly to STL next March! 🙂 I'm certainly ready to board that SWA plane & go! 🙂 Just as I always do before I take a trip, I'm already counting down the months! Then, I'll count down the weeks, days, & hours. :) SWA LUV! 🙂
Not applicable
I enjoy flying both in the real world and on my flight simulator X. I want to be a pilot for southwest in a couple of years. But to make my flight simulator as realistic as possible I was wondering about a few things. One question I have is what is the rate of climb up to 10,000 and then up to cruise what is it? My next question is what is the descent speed and rate of descent? My third question is how do you decide when to descend, how far out, what is the rule for that? This question is not about a simulator but, why do you have to turn off all electronic devices under 10,000 when some of them do not put out a radio frequency or any kind of frequency like your ipod or PSP(when internet is turned off)? Thank You very much for answering my question and I hope to fulfill my dream very soon!